Vietnam – A Summary

Rule of Three

Highlights (Alex): My birthday – cake, flowers, cooking class, boat rides, lovely dinner and wonderful show. Boating through Trang An in Ninh Binh, so peaceful and beautiful. The scenery of Ha Giang, just beautiful and wonderful to be within so much nature again

Highlights (James): Ha Giang loop, Ninh Binh tranquillity, Hoi An old town at night

Lowlights (Alex): the gun range in Cu Chi, the heat (again), hot and trapped in the train cabin

Lowlights (James): sleeper transports, heatstroke, scooter swarms of Ho Chi Minh City

Takeaways (Alex): the wealth disparity still exists here, but instead of the wealthy being imperialist foreigners, it is Vietnamese, and that seems more acceptable somehow? Seeing propaganda work both ways, I’m learning to question more and more what we’re told by the media or the powers that be. Never underestimate the will of a nation desperate to fight for their freedom, we rightly or wrongly have drawn parallels with Ukraine and Vietnam, both under-powered and underestimated, hopefully Ukraine wins out in the end too, but the USA was a very different country to Russia, so who knows.

Takeaways (James): discovering new things on a whim with no prior knowledge or expectations is really invigorating, and a rarity. Every country should have a catchy patriotic song. Feeling hot will never feel the same again after Vietnam

Description (Alex): Hugely varied, from crazy bustling cities, to the peaceful simple life of the country. Amazing food, it’s so fresh and varied, spring rolls, soups, curries, pancakes, stews, salads, all so tasty (although often spicy). Patriotic, and for good reason, they deserve their freedom and should be proud of what they have accomplished as a nation.

Description (James): Stunning countryside, hectic cities, chaotic culture… good coffee though

Entertainment

TV: Top Gear Vietnam, Kiki’s Delivery Service, The Cat Returns

Books: The Women

Podcasts: [the usual]

Where We Stayed

Airbnb (Ho Chi Minh City): ⭐️ 4

Uptown Hoi An Hotel: ⭐️ 5 pool, buffet breakfast, robes, huge bathroom, birthday treats

Hue Lovely Homestay: ⭐️ 3.5 lovely hosts, Happy the happy dog, just room a bit lacking in shape unfortunately

Tam Coc Relax Homestay: ⭐️ 4.5 amazing views, pool, breakfast, bikes, friendly, bathroom a bit basic and damp smell but brilliant

Hong Hao Hostel (Ha Giang): ⭐️ 3.5 great double bed dorm, as private as can be, free breakfast, letting us in at 4am

Yen Minh Homestay (Ha Giang Loop): ⭐️ 3 fine, bloody sheets, less fine

Tom Gu Dia Homestay (Ha Giang Loop): ⭐️ 3 great pool, weird ‘gym’?, shared bathroom, no sound insulation, fan only

Homestay Lam Nui (Ha Giang Loop): ⭐️ 3 good karaoke, filthy room

Hong Hao Hostel (Ha Giang) private room: 4 good bed and bath after 4 days on the bikes, no breakfast boo

Sunrise Paon Hotel (Hanoi): ⭐️ 4.5, if only the gym wasn’t entirely broken

Cutting Room Floor

• The glowing red government signs informing the public of an update, and then switching over to a Tiffany’s advert. What is this country?
• Sausages getting hot stone massages
• Seeing said hot stones on the street floor in the morning presumably where they get washed
• It’s impossible to forget what country you are in in Vietnam, at any moment you are probably no more than 5 metres from a flag, even in the countryside
• It’s amazing to see the indigenous communities and cultures still going strong, serving a reminder of what was lost in Latin America
• Their land up in Ha Giang is protected so they will always have their land to live from and keep their ways of life going
• The propaganda billboards adjust to the region and up in Ha Gaing they depict the Hmong people compared to the city dwellers in the south posters
• The very excited tour guide on a boat in Ninh Binh accompanying a Nepalese couple on what would have been a romantic boat ride for their honeymoon, except for the guide making conversation with everyone around asking nationalities
• The fresh off the boat young British women with no clue how to use a squat toilet
• Another nightmare wax scenario. This time worrying about being kidnapped, then robbed, then just personally berated for paying with a note twice the value of the wax after telling the lady I didn’t have enough money for a full wax
• Add on being chastised because “in [your] country is not much money, here it is a lot”, with an eye roll and glare that I am scrimping on a full leg wax. At least the wax was good.
• A reminder to never go anywhere not on Google, it’s about the only bit of leverage a tourist has.
• The kids who weren’t remotely entertained by the water puppets, but also weren’t remotely parented by a single family member as they talked, yelled, and played with their seat cushions the whole way through the show
• One of the kids even punched the (I assume) mother for attention, and she just took it like that was a standard occurrence
• A caterpillar that found its way onto me before James and another guy delicately removed it from me, only for guide Emma to stomp on it and kill it
• Too many 5 star Google reviews to be trusted, seemed very suspicious and you can’t filter by rating so it’s really hard to find potentially genuine bad reviews amongst the mass 5 stars
• Street smoothie and coffee culture rather than getting drunk

Photos