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Running

Our first activity in San Francisco is… parkrun! Yaaaaay. Only one of us is cheering. It’s actually not really in San Francisco, but it’s near enough the jeep rental to make it work. I’m not sure if the experience of Stan scamming us is entirely worth it, but it sure makes me happy to tick another country off the parkrun list. Unlike in Japan it’s less obvious who the tourists are here, also because it seems there are many a local expat. Apparently, the parkrun was further in the centre of San Fran, but during COVID they moved it out to Palo Alto (where many tech companies are). I wonder if the people that started it left the city and took parkrun with them. As always, we feel very grateful to the volunteers who make this achievement possible.

It’s a pretty flat and unassuming course through a wetland. Everyone is very friendly and there are even snacks for afters. This is the only parkrun in all of California, so there’s many a dedicated (bonkers) foreigner here too.

We have our final breakfast out of the back of the jeep, chat to some fellow parkrunners, drive over to the garage, and hand back our home for the last eleven nights. Back to lugging our gear on our backs and fronts and lengthy journeys on public transport.

Prisoning

We’re eventually welcomed to San Francisco proper by a rough looking man yelling at the sky, and a gent sitting eating a banana outside a cafe who greets us with “my son’s called Kingsley”. Okay… It’s a stark contrast to the blissful peace and safety of the National Parks, and it takes us aback once more. Thankfully we are able to check-in to our hotel in San Francisco early, and so head off for some clam chowder lunch.

Our next stop today is by way of ferry to Alcatraz. We’ve opted for an evening trip for extra night-time spookiness (or so the reviews suggest). Crossing a picket line demanding a living wage, we join the international masses onto the ferry that will take us to The Rock!

Also check out this blanket of cloud that heavily hangs above, making us actually cold for the first time in a long time! The layer of cloud is like a blanket sitting above us and the city, it’s pretty impressive, and reminds me a bit of Lima. Although this is very much more a blanket of cloud compared to the moving mist of Lima the grey. We also learn of Karl the Fog (Google it, weird).

By way of audio-tour we learn about the prison and some of its inmates. Expecting this to house the worst of the worst with some pretty horrendous stories, we actually learn that most prisoners here were pretty cordial. I guess when you’re at the top of your game criminal wise there’s less of an obvious pecking order. There were also just your average criminals here too, and a good few with pretty horrendous mental health problems, terribly sad backgrounds, and even a conscientious objector! Alongside the inmates you had the guards who lived on island with their families. What a place to grow up. There was one successful escape method (although people suspect they drowned in the freezing sea), one attempted takeover that sadly ended lives rather than sentences, and one invasion by indigenous communities after it closed to try and get their native land back. The prison was closed in 1964 after 30 years.

On our way out, we learn about the infamous Al Capone, one of Alcatraz’s most famous inmates. What we learn is that crime certainly didn’t pay in his story. Capone was only in this thirties when he died of syphilis, after the disease had ravaged his mind to the point of deteriorating his mental capacity to that of a teenager. Not so tough as the legendary reputation.

Cheering and Touristing

Our first full day in San Fran is spent having a bit of a wander and explore, ticking off some suggested boxes by ex-San Fran resident Jen (thanks Jen!).

We start off with a heavenly brunch that is a welcome break from our porridge staple the last 300 days, treating ourselves to some variants of the classic mimosa but with grapefruit and cranberry.

Next up, there’s a match to watch. England have made it to the final of the World Cup, and we join many a foreign fan (for both teams) in a packed out Irish pub cheering, jeering, and commiserating.

After the (somewhat expected) disappointment, it’s time to get touristing. Much to my delight, one to-do is to have some chocolate or ice-cream from Ghirardelli, a San Franciscan staple that goes back to 1852. We gorge so much sugar even I start to feel a bit unwell.

We then checkout Lombard Street, known for its flowering switch-backs, that celebrates the rolling hills of the city. After which, we have a chill night in watching The Rock, a film set on Alcatraz.

Biking

Our second full day in San Fran is spent exploring by bike this time, allowing us to go a bit further afield, including cycling over the Golden Gate Bridge. This is one part fantastic, another part infuriating, as at points you share the narrow pathway with dawdlers and teenagers insistent on walking arm in arm, and speed cyclists seemingly trying to get a PB across the bridge, often at the same time. I’m not sure which were worse.

Surviving the dodge-course that is the bridge, we continue to follow the coast around and down to the Golden Gate Park, and through to the beach, featuring windmills!

The beaches here are as vast as the ones in LA, and if it weren’t for the markedly different weather that is reminiscent of Cornwall, it would have been the perfect bathing spot. It’s pretty remarkable having this cosmopolitan city right next to this vast beach.

No time for that anyway, we set off back towards the east side and towards the growing rolling hills. Despite my protestations, James insists that Google knows we’re on bikes and wouldn’t send us on a route we couldn’t cycle…

You can see how that went. Nevertheless, the cycle through these northern boroughs is glorious. The architecture reminds me of London, with each house being unique in design, colour and/or style. Terraces meet mansions meet apartments. Streets are closed off for “quiet zones” akin to our LTNs that make them tranquil and safe to cycle down. I could easily get lost just wandering the many beautifully distinct areas of just this one part of the city, admiring the designs all around. Loved it.

After an exhausting finish to the bike drop off, we get changed for a special evening out at a recommended Italian seafood restaurant nearby.

We sit at the bar watching the perfectly oiled machine of the kitchen prep their refined menu with ease and precision. It’s fascinating, and huge respect to all kitchen staff who toil away in the heat and cramped quarters of all restaurants. We thoroughly enjoy our salmon with greens, and clam pasta, with a lovely fresh white wine for good measure.

Killing Time

Our flight out of the US isn’t until the afternoon, so we have one more day to kill. We decide to try out some crab (although not the Dungeness kind, if anyone can tell me why Kent crabs are in San Fran I’d be grateful!), and another clam chowder. Note for anyone going to eat at the Fisherman’s Wharf, the prices are to eat outside, go inside and you have a different menu, sneaky!

We meander along the seafront to see the resident and protected sea-lions basking in the sun.

And continue down to the Ferry Terminal and get a bit of an experience of down-town San Fran.

One thing missing from this post so far is the ever-present Waymo self-driving car that has just been released onto the streets of this part of San Fran only two weeks prior. There are 800 of them cruising the streets, and you honestly can’t go a block without seeing one:

They largely drive pretty well, but certainly get as confused and flustered as humans do in the pedestrian packed walkways of Fisherman’s Wharf, where its need to be overly cautious causes it to hop and stagnate as meandering tourists wander all around it confusing it’s sensors. A human would no doubt just start edging into the pedestrians, Waymo of course cannot. Otherwise it handles the four way crossings with more ease than we do, and provides ample entertainment to see them driving around with no-one in the front seats. We’ll have to give them a try next time, as for now, it’s off to Canada-eh.

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Adventure – exploring by foot and bike. Going back in time in our hotel that maintains its Victorian-esque features and style.

Excitement – seeing Waymo at almost every corner. Watching the kitchen at work. Cycling over the most famous bridge in the world (sorry Tower Bridge). Calorific treats.

Trauma – more experience of the mentally unwell, Golden Gate gawmless.

Our time in the wonderful Yosemite is coming to an end, we leave the Crane Flat campsite and set off along the highway. We pass by Cloud’s Rest and admire our hiking effort from yesterday and the cold lake we swam in too. A tinge of sadness hits as we proceed through the park exit, leaving behind this incredible national park.

Having done quite a bit of driving in the park we’re getting quite low on fuel. As expected the fuel prices in the park are pretty expensive and the same is true just outside it too, as they know people will be desperate to refuel. At an extortionate $7.60 a gallon we see how far we can last on fumes and attempt to make it another 70km for fuel at half the price. Thanks to Alex’s efficient driving we make it with fumes to spare. From here we continue on to Lake Tahoe, highly recommended by Californians as a very nice place to relax by a magnificent, mile deep lake. It’s strange to be back in civilization again surrounded by busy multi-lane roads, fast food chains everywhere and concrete towers blocking out the sunshine.

We make a much needed stop at a laundromat, scoff a big bag of fries and continue on to check-in at our final campsite, Fallen Leaf.

We setup camp, transfer any scented items we have to the bear box and have a wander around the grounds. We check out the nearby Fallen Leaf Lake and have a brief look at the giant Lake Tahoe, promising ourselves we’ll return later for dinner overlooking the lake while the sun sets.

We freshen up (in a coin-operated campsite shower full of flying beasties as we wash against the clock), don our ‘formal’ gear and head back towards the lake. Sadly the only lakeside restaurant within walking distance has decided to stop serving food an hour earlier than expected, so we have to settle for drinks only. The $14 cocktails served in a plastic cup are pretty much thrown at us and we suspect they’ve had a very busy day. We enjoy the strong drinks watching the sunset over the lake.

Returning to camp, which is now in complete darkness as there are no lights, we have no choice but to settle for instant noodles cooked on our portable hob. While cooking we can hear other campers shouting at a bear to leave them alone! We cook with one eye looking out for any uninvited dinner guests. Scared the smell of delicious instant noodles will attract the furry beasts we seek refuge in the front seats of our Jeep. Not quite the evening meal we had in mind!

Strokes and S(a)tan

The next morning we take a dip in the cool waters of the Fallen Leaf lake.

Afterwards we check out of camp and head for a game of minigolf at a fantastic local attraction.

After minigolf (which I won) we fill up on grub at a BBQ joint.

Now we have one night left before we need to drop the car off outside of San Francisco, we have to drop it back before 10am so we want to stay nearby so we don’t need to do a long drive first thing in the morning. So, up to this point we have no reservation of where to stay tonight. Motels are around $80 at the cheapest and as we can still sleep in our roof tent we want to try and find an RV park to spend one last night on top of a Jeep. For some reason, RV park websites have not been updated since they were made in the 1990s and all of them insist you call them to book, it is not possible to book them online. Unable to call them, we figure we’ll just rock up and see what rate they can offer us for one night.

We drive all the way to Palo Alto, a stone’s throw away from the car drop (and also a Park Run). We find an RV Park and the owner isn’t around. A friendly restaurant worker says he’ll give him a call and as we wait a resident in the RV park tells us the owner, called Stan will probably give us a good rate for a one night stay. After a short wait, Stan turns up. He must be in his eighties and does not seem to be in a great mood. We ask if he has any spaces for one night and he enquires what facilities we’ll need “just access to a toilet and some water if there is any”. He grunts. “$65”. To park on a 6ft piece of tarmac for barely 12 hours. We ask if he can do it any cheaper. He grunts again. “How much did you pay at the campsites?” He asks. Between $20-40 we answer truthfully. He clearly doesn’t believe us and gives us a take it or leave it offer of $50. Lacking options we have no choice but to give in. Of course after we pay the agreed money we are then told it’s an extra $10 deposit for the toilet access key. We’re then told his assistant won’t be here until 10am tomorrow to pay back said deposit, throwing our Park Run plans into ruin. After a lot of pleading and compromise we agree to waive the key deposit and he’ll leave us a key to the men’s toilet only (God knows why). I get that he’ll likely need to deal with some pretty difficult people, but he really makes us feel like we’re hard work and he’s doing us a massive favour here. “You can always park on the street, but someone might climb into your tent” he offers as a crude dig. To add insult to injury he then says “oh you’ve been traveling for a year huh? Another $10 is nothing to you then” and scoffs. He never believed we’d return the toilet key through his office letterbox. Writing this up now I think I should have dropped it down the sewer drain on the way out after his stinking attitude. But we’re better people than that.

Running off the rage

After a pretty difficult night of sleep we depart the parking space and head on to Byxbee Parkrun… Over to Alex for coverage on that and beyond.

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Adventure – Swimming in Fallen Leaf Lake.

Excitement – An excellent round of minigolf.

Trauma – Stan. Having to bite my tongue and be nice to someone clearly taking us for a ride (Alex).

Visiting Yosemite National Park was always a definite on the travel list. Many more national parks were also on the list, but various people from the US told us that some could come off it, but Yosemite had to stay. It was also important we stay in the park to make the most of it, apparently. With this in mind, it was with a good amount of dismay that when I started looking into it back in the Philippines (!), I found out that not only had the National Parks Service decided to continue a permit system from 2023 that limited access during when we would be there, but that accommodation within the park sells out instantly. It seemed the Yosemite plan would be more difficult to come to fruition than trying to get tickets to Glastonbury. So, five months prior, amidst studying for our PADI in SE Asia, I was logging on to get us permits for a date we hoped we might be there. The permit allowed us to enter the park, but not sleep in it. A bridge we’d have to come to later down the line.

Fast forward to trying to figure out the whole USA road trip, whilst in the USA (thanks WWOOFing), and all accommodation in and outside Yosemite was fully booked or ridiculously expensive (the same could be said for Sequoia and King’s Canyon actually!). It seemed that first come first served camping is a thing of the past in these parts. So much for the freedom of living wild and free in our jeep on the roads, pulling up where we found ourselves. Our only hope was a second release of campspots a couple of weeks prior to when we thought we might be there, to try and secure some spots, in a hope it would fit in with a future route we hadn’t yet decided. Fun.

Eventually, through a lot of effort, and regularly checking the website for last minute cancellations, when I probably should have been enjoying the moment, we had some pitches booked. They meant moving campground and/or pitch almost everyday, but needs must. Thankfully, the pitches in the National Parks are actually pretty reasonably priced, far cheaper than anywhere outside the park.

Getting the following to all come together took a lot of effort and planning to make happen. Something that’s not so bad when you’re planning your holiday, sitting at your desk pretending to work, but a big headache when you’re still trying to plan tomorrow. But, it was totally worth it, and I’d do it all again tomorrow if we could. Just, if you want to go to Yosemite, plan waaaay in advance! Because everyone else will be.

So, to the stint itself…

Flea and Cricket

Unable to sleep in the heat bowl that is the Codorniz Campground, we give up tossing and turning and decide to head off at the crack of dawn. It makes for an impressive sight though, seeing the ball of heat rise over the gold all around us.

The road out was once more, other-worldy, but in a totally different way. A few cows stare at us, chewing the cud, as we turn up a farm-track. Little did we understand that this was going to be another Google classic and the cows were rightly bemused to see anyone other than their owner go up this road. It’s a slow slog along the bumpy dirt track.

Much of the journey out of this part is ferrying a bunch of unsuspecting crickets who jump out of the way of our jeep and end up clinging on for dear life up the road. Some manage to hang on for so long it would be like moving to a different continent, we wonder if they have homes to somehow get back to! Eventually, the rolling fields of flowing golden grasses abate and civilisation returns. I won’t miss the heat but those views were something else.

Yosemite

Soon enough, the temperature starts dropping, and the road starts being lined with evergreens once more. Phew!

First up in actual Yosemite was Glacier Point, somewhere we drove to ‘on the way’ to the valley. Our jaws literally dropped as we came through the pine forest and the sky opened up to show Half Dome up ahead. It was epic.

Time to head into the valley itself. We only managed to get one night camping in the valley, so I was determined we make the most of it. It doesn’t disappoint! The views here are breath-taking, with the green of the Meadows in the valley floor, against the grey granite walls surrounding us, and the perfectly blue sky, I can’t believe we’re here.

James has spotted many a bather at the river that runs through the valley, and suggests we cool off and clean off the sweat from Codorniz. As always, it’s a great idea. The water sure is cold, but there’s also ample entertainment from other visitors playing around in the freezing water around us.

Another one of James’s brilliant ideas is to treat ourselves to a special campfire dinner to celebrate being in Yosemite at last. We celebrate with bubbles (out of our Patagonia Brewery cups of course), sausages and mushrooms! Makes a change from our usual fare.

Despite a few clamourings of pots and pans and people calmly yelling “not here bears”, we see none and seem safe and sound in the middle of the campground. One benefit to sleeping on top of your car in bear country!

A Climb and Three Falls

We’re up early the next morning (thank you raven alarms) to pack up, park up, and head up to see some waterfalls. The main Mist Trail is shut at the moment, so we’re ‘forced’ to do the more challenging route going up and around to Nevada Falls, following the John Muir Trail (which gives us bragging rights according to the volunteer directing woeful Mist Trail wanabees). We find this a challenging, but not as bad as we thought, jaunt up some steep switchbacks. Thankfully we’re in the shade for all of it, and even get a bit rained on by some snow-melt water dripping overhead.

We’re surprised we make it to the top in such good time, and I’m once more taken aback by how picture-postcard beautiful this place is.

There’s even an overlook where you can see the water rolling down the rock face below, with all its might.

We already seem on top of the world here that we can’t fathom where this endless supply of rushing water is coming from. We skiddadle on down the other side of the Falls and enjoy the views as we descend below them, and on to Vernal Falls, where we can catch the top end of the Mist Trail, and have a water refill and paddle.

After a brief slog back up to Clark’s Point in the blazing sun now, we return back down, desperate for water. Thankfully, Yosemite is good at putting toilets and water refill points where it can, so we’re able to replenish on the return leg. We see many a hot and gasping intrepid hiker trying to start in the now midday heat and wonder how well they’ll fair now there’s little shade. As one of the campground hosts told us, “you can never start too early”. We’re so lucky we got to camp here and do just that.

On our return we ask another volunteer for some tips of hikes to do in the valley. “I don’t want to be a hike snob, but your best hikes are out of the valley“. He recommends Cloud’s Rest, which we’ve actually read about on another blog. We’re proud that he identifies us as fit, able and prepared hikers, but I’m also dubious he hasn’t maybe over estimated our abilities!

On our way back to the car, I hear a crack and crunch from the foliage to our left. “Probably just a big bird”, I dismiss, but James’s curiosity is piqued and he goes back to check. Lo and behold, there’s a bear with her cubs chomping their way through just next to us. Of course by the time I can get the camera out to try and get evidence, they’ve already moved on.

We’ve sadly got to leave the valley as our next campground is out towards the entrance, but first we make a stop at The Dawn Wall of El Capitan, made famous by a couple of climbing documentaries.

We cannot fathom how anyone could climb up this huge sheer wall of stone in one day without any ropes.

Day one done!

Valley Bimbles

We head back into the valley the next day as I still don’t think I’ve had enough of it. Today we’re taking it easy though to keep our strength for the next day, so we explore the villages and check out the view of Yosemite Falls from below.

We bimble about and get lost a bit around the valley, then head back to our now favourite river paddling spot to cool down and clean off.

James even braves the rapids down (after a couple of beers), which we’d seen people going down the days before with an “oooh” and “ouch” as their bums hit the rocks underneath.

We’ve decided to treat ourselves to an evening meal in the valley today, and not worry about fires, or gas, or washing up. It’s a lovely treat!

Clouding Around

Our final day in Yosemite is doing a hike out of the valley. The one we’d read about and was then recommended by the volunteer. We head off ready for another scorching day, not prepared for the onslaught of flies and mosquitos that follow us the whole way along the trial. It’s a beautiful walk, if only we could enjoy it, but every stop for a photo or snack or drink means the bugs catch us up. It means we make it up in record time though!

We somewhat dread the return back into bugville, but it seems the sun has burnt them all away, so we can see the route in an entirely new light, able to take it in a bit more. It is, however, pretty darn hot again now, we only pause for so long before running to the next spot of shady relief.

No longer in the valley and able to access our favourite cool-down spot, we try out a nearby lake that has attracted many a vacationer. It’s a perfect spot to wash away the grime and sweat of the day.

And that’s our lot for Yosemite National Park. A valley formed by a glacier long, long ago, that became the inspiration for the National Parks system, we can see why.

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Adventure – exploring Yosemite’s valleys and surrounding areas

Excitement – some rock exfoliating from the cliff by our campsite as soon as we arrived. Spotting our first bears. Being in Yosemite at long last

Trauma – the incredibly loud dude in Upper Pines who seemed to be shouting to his friend standing right next to him. Thankfully they went to bed early and got up late. Bear boxes, the never-ending back and foreward of bear boxes.

Late Arrivals

We leave Las Vegas in our new machine, a large but comfortable Jeep Wrangler. There are none of the fancy features or gizmos of the modern BMW but we are well equipped with camping, cooking and sleeping supplies (or so we think). There is a roof nest fixed to the top of the roof-racks where we shall sleep for the next eleven nights.

It’s a seven hour, 645km journey from Vegas to our campground in the Sequoia national park. We share the driving and I take the reins for the first half. It’s a challenging drive having to choose between a 55mph slow lane full of articulated lorries or a 90mph fast lane with pickups aggressively driving up behind you even when you’re 25mph over the speed limit. After some time I notice the miles per gallon on our new vehicle is a devastating 18mpg and wonder how much gas this beast is going to guzzle over the next twelve days. Luckily after we escape Nevada (and the 115°F/46°C Death Valley area) things calm down a bit and I hand the driving over to Alex.

We stop for some dinner at Denny’s and even though we left Indie Campers two hours earlier than anticipated, we are driving up hairpin bends, at 20mph, under the pitch black nightsky. Eventually we arrive at the campsite just before midnight, long after all of the other campers have gone to sleep. We have to figure out how a bear box (a large metal cube designed to protect food/toiletries from bears) works in the dark and very tired. We also raise our roof nest for the first time, luckily it rises up in a few seconds and we do not have to faff around with tent poles in the dark.

The Bigger They Are…

After a much needed lie-in, it’s time to go and see some huge trees called sequoias. These magnificent pillars of nature may not be as tall as their redwood cousins but they are wider. In fact they are the widest trees in the world.

Sequoia national park is the only place on earth where these trees grow naturally. Why is that? Well they require very specific conditions to grow, a certain altitude, a low but not dry water table and most strangely of all, fire. Yes these lumbering giants rely on natural wildfires to clear the ground of rival trees so their acorns can sprout and then they can thrive. Their bark is fire resistant so once they are established they have a natural shield to protect against the frequent wildfires in the area. On occasion the most sacred trees will have their bases wrapped in aluminum foil to add further protection from extreme fires.

We start with a walk around the pathway of giants and guess how many Alex’s (with her arms stretched wide) it would take to fit around these massive trees. We actually measure it out at one point and it takes fourteen Alex’s to hug one average sized sequoia!

The next stop on the tour is Moro Rock with brilliant views across the park. In the distance we can even spot some snow that is still resisting the heat of the summer sun.

We follow the path back down Moro Rock and board the shuttle bus to the pleasantly named Crescent Meadow. Here we pose with some more giant trees, spot a marmot posing on a fallen log and enjoy the peace and quiet of being immersed in nature. The trees obviously look massive from any angle but once they fall it’s astounding how indescribably huge they are.

Returning back towards the shuttle bus we make a visit to General Sherman, one of the biggest sequoia trees in the world. There are taller and wider trees, but the General Sherman Tree contains more volume in its trunk than any other tree on Earth. It is estimated to be around 2200 years old! A handy sign informs us how many people (or Alex’s) it would take to fit holding hands around this tree… 23!

Amusingly it was originally named the Karl Marx tree by a local socialist community living in the area. After they were *ahem* removed, the tree was renamed Sherman after the American Generals who fought in the Civil War. How predictable.

Back at Camp Lodgepole we take advantage of the natural facilities and bathe in the freezing cold stream flowing through the campsite. We rinse some clothes and our dusty limbs, immersing ourselves in this off-grid lifestyle. At our camp spot, we gather firewood and cook our first meal on a campside fire pit. We rush our beers and race across camp to make it to the ranger talk at 8.30pm. He talks about the wildlife in the park and the number of resident bears in the SEKI area… 800 black bears!

Happy Fourth!

The next morning we set off on yet another hike to some nearby falls. There’s not much to report on the hike except looking out for bear activity (we see none) and being wished a “Happy Fourth” by Americans. They clearly didn’t notice my Ha Giang Loop t-shirt from Vietnam 😂

Afterwards it’s time for a short drive along the Generals Highway towards our next camp site, Stony Creek. It’s a nice location but we are immediately set upon by dozens of flies buzzing around us as we try to enjoy some lunch…

After exploring the campsite, cooling our feet in the nearby creek and collecting far too much firewood, we celebrate the fourth of July! Indulging in some strong beers and a bottle of Apothic Red I bought from the store. With the promise of a day off tomorrow, I indulge a bit too much and struggle to remember how the night ended or how I managed to make it up the ladder to bed in such a forlorn state. Don’t drink kids.

Kings Canyon (hungover)

Waking up in a somewhat groggy state I’m… instructed that we will not be having a day off at camp but instead there is a hike that Alex has picked out over in Kings Canyon. In fairness, it would have been quite an unpleasant stay in camp with all of the annoying bugs and the rising heat, but I’m certainly in no fit state to drive so Alex takes the wheel and I feel very sorry for myself.

What better cure is there for a hangover than a four hour hike in the midday sun? Well, if there is one, it’s not available here, on a hiking we must go.

On the return to camp we make a stop at General Grant, another General standing out in this army of sequoia trees. Some facts stolen from Wikipedia as I was too hungover to write any notes: President Calvin Coolidge proclaimed it the “Nation’s Christmas Tree” on April 28, 1926. Due in large part to its huge base, the General Grant tree was thought to be the largest tree in the world prior to 1931, when the first precise measurements indicated that the General Sherman was slightly larger. On March 29, 1956, President Dwight D. Eisenhower declared the tree a “National Shrine”, a memorial to those who died in war. It is the only living object to be so declared. Back when these giants were first found, some of them were chopped down to prove to the world they existed, but people thought it was a hoax with parts of trees put together to make the giants. Essentially the trees were killed to prove they lived… and even then they didn’t believe them.

Back at Camp Flyville we cool off in the creek running parallel to the campsite and make an evening meal praying that the flies, gnats and mosquitos might leave us in peace (they don’t).

California Cruisin

Our journey must continue on, we will travel Northbound to Yosemite. We depart the relative cool air of the mountains to the hazy heat of the Californian desert. We make a stop in Fresno to use a laundromat and make an important stop at Chili’s to refuel and recharge our electronic devices. It’s a brief return to civilization as we then venture back into the wilderness. We drive through bone-dry lands where the grass has turned to a soft yellow colour, completely deprived of water. We setup camp in Codorniz where the evening temperature is still in the 40 degrees which according to the Park Ranger here is “too damn hot, even the rattlesnakes don’t come out in this heat”. We get some reprieve from the dreaded bearboxes, instead warned of raccoons. We’ll take that. After evening meal we call our friends Alex and Clive and arrange to meet them in Canada in a couple of weeks time. But before that we must visit Yosemite National Park, over to Alex for that one…

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Adventure – Wandering in the shadows of giants. Sleeping on top of a car. Epic long drives in the sunshine and some night-time slaloms. Trying to wash my hair in a camp chair using a 5L bottle of freezing water

Excitement – Seeing some spectacular waterfalls and being sprayed with mist to cool us off. Watching out for bears 🐻 Cooking meals by campfire.

Trauma – Sleepless night in Codorniz thanks to the heat and a loud family nearby. The army of bugs in Camp Stony Creek. The hassle of bear boxes.

We can’t stop here, this is bat country!

Today is a sad day. We must return our beloved BMW that has smoothly carried us over hundreds of miles across Nevada, Utah and Arizona. Through baking hot deserts, parking nightmares, beautiful landscapes and horrendous storms, we’re sad to hand the keys back of the car that’s provided so many memories. On the return drive to Las Vegas we pass by the Hoover Dam but there isn’t time to stop so we just get a glimpse. Worried that our car is covered in layers of orange dirt and dust from Monument Valley we stop at a self-serve car wash on the outskirts of Vegas. There are around sixteen options from four different hoses and as two dollars only buys us four minutes, it’s a race against the clock to clean the car. Of course we can’t clean a big SUV in that time so we restart and do it properly this time.

I drop Alex off at the Luxor hotel with approximately fourteen bags of belongings we’ve accumulated and race across Vegas to refuel and return the car before 2pm. All goes to plan and I meet Alex back at the pyramid shaped hotel, ready to check in. I’ve wanted to stay in this hotel since my Auntie and Uncle stayed here pre-millenium and filled my mind with the curious wonder of Las Vegas. I’m sure it’s changed a bit since then but the ridiculous feat of architecture still stands out, even when surrounded by other over-the-top hotels.

We barely have time to inhale our lunch before heading out into the 45 degrees heat to cross the strip to the MGM Grand. Alex has always wanted to see a Cirque De Soleil show in Vegas and has chosen the “Ka” show out of several options. We take our seats in the huge arena, surrounded by giant towers and gangways unsure if they are just for show or part of the show. We soon have the answer as fifteen minutes before the show is due to begin, performers start swinging from the rafters. I won’t go into details on the show but it was fantastic, there were many “how did they do that?” gasps as well as plenty of heart in mouth moments as the dare devils do their thing.

After the performance we wander the strip and stumble upon a Stranger Things experience/store…

We take a break in the huge room within the pyramid. How they keep this behemoth of a building with over 500 rooms (all with pitch black windows) cool in the searing desert heat is beyond me.

For our evening sustenance we take a short walk up the strip, past the giant fairytale castle that is Excalibur and into New York New York, a hotel that even has its own rollercoaster. Vegas is nothing if not excessive, over-the-top, totally unnecessary but why the hell not, and we’re all here for it.

From the Pyramids Egypt to the Canals of Venice

We finally have a full day to properly explore this crazy city and so after a much needed lie-in, we head out onto the strip. We see as many of the weird and wonderful hotels as we can, here are some pictures to try and piece it together.

We take lunch at one of the only ‘cheap eats’ places on the Strip, for some reason even fast food in Vegas is three times the price as usual. Afterwards we decide to be one of the only people to try out the gym at the Luxor hotel. While most guests gamble away, enjoying the excess or wallowing around in the swimming pool with a beer bucket in hand, we want to pump some iron. There’s only a handful of dedicated souls in the gym which works out just fine for us.

Now that we’ve pretended to be healthy it’s time for a night out on the town and of course, try our hand at gambling. We have a wonderful meal at Brewdog (yes they do exist out here) and decide we’ll try our luck at the Excalibur casino.

We’ve already wasted a few small dollars on little flutters, I watched in horror as my $10 disappeared in a matter of seconds on one of the new ‘digital’ slot machines. $5 on Blackjack goes a similar way. Alex tries her hand at roulette and while she does well to stay in the game for quite a while, we end up with $2 change from another $10. So it seems we’re just bleeding money and we’re not cut out for this gambling lark. We decide to pop the last $2 into a relic of a slot machine from way back when. We earn a few extra credits and have no real idea what’s happening until “FANTASTIC WIN” glows in big letters on the screen. The credits tick up and up and I figure we’ve probably won a few dollars. From $2 we jump to $61!

Not a huge win, we won’t be buying a yacht, but still it’s a great feeling to get one back on the house. The next hour or so is a blur as we carefully plot which slot machine might be lucky next. Somehow it works as we end up winning another $51 then $32 in quick succession. Of course our luck runs out eventually and we call it a night around 2am but what a fun night it has been. The maths is blurry but all in I think we came out around $100 up overall. Not bad at all.

Fear and Leaving in Las Vegas

It’s been a whirlwind couple of days in this mad place. While at first we did not understand the hype, we were eventually swept up in the ridiculousness of it all. There is nowhere on earth like Sin City and I dare say that whatever you do here you’re likely to have a good time and never forget it (unlesa you try and recreate The Hangover film of course!). But for us, it’s time to move on. We have a long, long drive ahead of us from Vegas, Nevada to Lodgepole campground in Sequoia National Park. Technically our allocated collection time is 14:30 and it’s at least a seven hour drive plus time to stock up at Walmart and eat along the way. Worried we won’t get to tonight’s camp until 2am, we chance getting there early and luckily they let us pick it up at noon. Time to hit the road again, this time in an entirely new beast…

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Adventure – Exploring the insane hotels of Las Vegas.

Excitement – Winning the jackpot (or so it felt to us paupers). Cirque De Soleil magic.

Trauma – The food options in Vegas are pretty terrible but I suppose that’s to be expected unless you pay big dollars. Not having a fridge or kettle so having to spend $10 on coffee when we’ve learnt every trick in the book to save the pennies on the basics, yeesh.

Working our way along from Monument Valley, we stop for lunch at a roadside shack serving Navajo bread, a frybread of the native American people. Here they are served as a ‘taco’ or ‘burger’ variety. We go for one of each. For some reason an army of Scouts has also just arrived here so we wait patiently in the shade as it’s now 44°c, while the husband and wife owners of the shack work hard to make up everyone’s order.

Approaching the Grand Canyon, we plan to see as much as possible with a few hours to go until sunset. We begin at Stone lookout and are both impressed by the enormity of the natural phenomenon.

Next we move on to a Geology station. Here we learn how the canyon was formed over millions of years of erosion by the Colorado River as it cut through the Colorado Plateau, which was uplifted by plate tectonics. Soon after, we walk the timeline trail where each one meter step is equivalent to 10 million years of human existence. It makes us realise how short humans have lived on planet earth, tens of thousands of years compared to the billions of years since the earth was formed. Like a tiny ant on an elephant and our lives are but one atom of such an ant. Or that’s how I imagine it anyway.

It’s time to walk around the rim and try to take in the sheer scale of this magnificent canyon. As a signpost informs us, it is not the longest, the widest or the deepest canyon in the world but it is perhaps the grandest. It’s hard to argue with that.

A man passes by us on the pathway and tells us there are eagles flying past just ahead, if we wait patiently, we will see them. We perch near the edge of the canyon wall and wait. As we’re about to question if he was having us on a blurry black shape hovers towards us. Soon it becomes clear it is indeed an eagle that soars right over our heads.

After quite a long trek around the rim (and a short run to the shuttle bus stop) we hop on and decide which stops we’ll get off at. Our plans are soon thwarted as the bus driver announces he will only be going so far as stop 5 (out of 11) as it’s getting late. Darn it. Still we get off at stop 4 and walk the short distance over to stop 5 to watch the sun setting over the canyon.

After a long long day (remember this day started with the Monument Valley tour) we need to get to our hotel which is an hour’s drive away. Alex offers to take the wheel and expertly drives us to the hotel under a sky blanketed with burning stars.

Rest Day (with a short hike)

After blitzing through four states since we arrived here, we’ve decided to take a rare day of rest to catch our breath and catch up on some planning. We have a leisurely breakfast at the hotel and restock at our favourite superstore (Walmart). Feeling like we might want to stretch our legs a bit to avoid spending all day in the rather basic hotel, I look for a short hike nearby. “Fatman’s Loop” comes up on Google, only a short drive away and at most a 2 mile easy loop.

We pull up onto the carpark and find a spot for a picnic lunch under the shelter of some pine trees. As we’re finishing our grub I spot a firewatch tower on the map. The route towards it picks up from Fatman’s Loop and it doesn’t look too much further away. Having played a videogame based on being a ranger in such a firetower, I’m immediately intrigued and it seems like destiny to see one in the flesh. I tell Alex I’ve changed the plan slightly and we set off to reach the tower. What follows is a steep and difficult ascent up and up, climbing to the top of the mountain to where the tower sits. It takes an age and is pretty exhausting in the afternoon heat. Over an hour in and Alex is not impressed, I suggest she can wait in the shade or return to the car but she is determined as ever to carry on and see the damn thing.

On the way up we see chipmunks, squirrels, rabbits, lots of birds and bugs and a snake! We also spot a gigantic train that has nearly 100 cargo containers in tow, we try and work out how many kilometers long it is as it seems to stretch as long as the entire town of Flagstaff down below. At least there are some distractions from the slog!

After a two hour ascent, we finally arrive at the base of the tower and a ranger is stood out on the balcony, binoculars pressed to his brow searching for signs of fire. There have been several large fires breakout over in California to the West and the park rangers here are on high alert in the extremely dry land and searing heat. The tower is surrounded by huge drum shaped radar dishes and many other pieces of technical equipment, it looks like a serious operational base. The total hike (after getting slightly lost on the way down) takes nearly four hours and we clock over 10km on our smart watches, whoops.

Similar to the carrot and stick method, I’ve promised Alex we can go for a steak tonight as a reward for doing such a strenuous hike. There’s an Outback (Australian restaurant chain) a five minute walk from our hotel so we don our glad rags and set out for steak. We share a large slab of beef short rib with a loaded baked potato with a side of mac and cheese. I treat myself to a large glass of red while Alex sticks with lager. All in all its a very tasty reward.

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Adventure – Seeing so many creatures and critters on our hikes. Watching the sun set over the canyon.

Excitement – The grand canyon, despite everything we’ve seen on this trip that was pretty damn impressive. Sharing a huge steak at Outback.

Trauma – Concern about the wildfires in Cali affecting our camping plans. Long drives with nothing interesting to look at. Hotel breakfast was very dull (unless you love sugar).

Page is a small town by USA standards, and once more we are staying on the outskirts where only drive-thrus and fast food chains are the only available eateries. It seems the only places in the USA where you have to pay extra for huge portions are fast-food chains. So they’re typically always the worst bet economically as well as nutritionally. Instead we decide to drive into town and eat at a fried chicken place that isn’t KFC, and it pays dividends in portion size, even if we are still eating with plastic cutlery.

Horseshoe Bend

Our first stop today is to Horseshoe Bend, a famous photo spot, that I always thought was of the Grand Canyon. We’ve been warned to go early before the hordes arrive, and we’re there with only a cluster of other people.

Ham for the Dam

Having ticked off one of the main attractions early, we have time to kill. So, of course, we fill it. I fancy checking out the nearby dam that we drove over the night before. The dam here creates Lake Powell, and we make the most of the visitor centre next door to learn all about this impressive construction.

Before they built the dam, they had to build the bridge. The construction of both these structures is what created the town of Page in the first place, to provide for all the workers. The bridge construction in itself is a massive feat of engineering. Being the highest largest bridge of that kind back in its day. It looks like a giant just slotted the bridge in between the two canyon walls, wedged in there for stability. What they actually had to do was abseil down/climb up the sides, drilling into the sides to create the huge pilot holes. A crane then lowered one half of the bridge down into place as it was secured to the wall, and held up by cables, until the other side of the bridge could be lowered into place on the opposite site. The rudimentary safety standards make this an even more impressive feat.

Next came the dam. I’d never really thought too much about how you build a dam, imagining something more akin to Caleb and Clarkson just putting stuff in the way of the water. Of course, engineers know better, and so first the water gets channelled around where the dam will be built, by way of a big tunnel. With the ground dry and accessible, the dam gets built. The tunnel filled in. Lake Powell is created, taking 17 years to fill up. Power is generated by huge turbines that are connected to thick metal cables, that connect up to an endless sea of pylons. We’d seen these before but had no idea the four cables that joined them with the dam were channelling all the electricity created up and out of the canyon.

There are holes drilled into the side of the canyon to let water seep out from where it will inevitably push its way through the canyon walls. I believe this is to relieve pressure on the rocks and manage the pressure so it doesn’t create big cracks in the canyon wall.

Last of all, we learn about the impact the dam had on the native people. Now, truth be told, native americans were no longer living down in this canyon. A many-years drought had forced them away. However, relics and artefacts from their ancestors remained. They tell passed down stories from their ancestors about this area, the importance of it, and the importance of water. The exhibit doesn’t shy away from acknowledging the lack of consideration the peoples of the 1950s had for the native populations and the environment. Rather it gives them a platform to help us learn to make more informed decisions in the future. One native american speaks on video about how their people always consider the impact of their actions on the world. They didn’t know who or what lived up or down the river from them, the river being the source of life, and so they would never do anything to impact it. This is such a simple take, that it makes your realise how blinkered our culture can be to ‘development’. His culture considers the bigger picture, not just on other humans, but on the animals, the life that co-exists with us. Something we’ve seen across the Americas. So when people may argue that they weren’t as developed as other cultures, perhaps that’s because they respected their environment in ways we didn’t, they considered the impacts of their actions and so they didn’t develop the land further, because the price was too great. It’s a lesson they clearly learnt centuries ago, and sadly one we are (sometimes) only learning now. We had and have a lot to learn from these cultures, it’s a shame our ancestors were so dismissive when they met.

Anyway, onwards!

Antelope Canyon

Our last attraction in Page is to go into Antelope Canyon, something called a ‘slot canyon’. It sells out quickly, so we’re booked in for an afternoon tour. James receives warning of a storm coming. We’ll trust in the tour company. Slot canyons are essentially where the water erodes the ground underneath more and more, creating spectacular formations in the ground. What appears to be a small crack on the surface, is actually a huge open expanse of wavy walls, carved by the running water. This also means they’re not safe places to be in storms. Don’t worry, our guide Xavier tells us that they run tours on a canyon further up the way, Canyon X, which would be first hit by any inclement weather. I wonder if the people on their Canyon X tours know that they’re the canaries in the coal-mine!

Thankfully our tour is dry and clear and we get to enjoy the magical sweeping formations all around us.

Our guide, a member of the Navajo, points out the traditional shapes of his peoples… the eagle, the storm-trooper, and the pirate. Right. He takes photos of everyone at the designated spots.

However, being sold on a tour that would teach us about navajo culture and the history and significance of this sacred and respected place, we get none of this information, as our guide starts wretching into the sacred sand on the latter half of the tour. Rather him than me I guess! Despite starting the tour reassuring us that he has electrolite drinks and supplies to help anyone with heat exhaustion, he seems reluctant to take any for himself, even though he blames the heat for his condition. Two members in our group, concerned for his health, rush the final section to get him out of the heat of the canyon. Somewhat disappointed, I ask in store if there are any information panels about the history of this stunning place, and am told no, because our guide should have given us that. In compensation, he gives me a booklet reserved for the deluxe tours. We try at the reception telling of our rushed tour and getting no information about the place, to which the lady basically shrugs and suggests it’s up to the tour guide. Not a company I would recommend (Ken’s). They must get thousands of people coming through every day so what is one bad review to them, they have a captive audience either way. It’s a shame really. It’s a stunning place, that I would love to have learnt more about, and the culture of the people who protect it, but we paid a lot of money to simply walk through it for 45 minutes, and we really got nothing more for our money other than access. But, supply and demand. If people are willing to pay that much, can we really blame them for charging it? Seems the Navajo learnt something from their capitalist neighbours.

Operation Desert Storm

The next day, we have a lazy morning start before we head off towards Monument Valley. Google warns us of an extreme thunderstorm, but the skies look clear compared to the previous days, and the prediction is of the storm above our journey. Meh, how bad can it be?

We take a little detour on to the Navajo National Monument on the way. The road is a Google classic that I should be able to drive 60mph on, but the conditions mean I crawl along at 20 at the fastest.

Eventually getting back to paved roads, we find the Visitor Centre and I take a wander along the short trails, as the clouds and thunder roll in, and James has a rest in the car. I reassure myself that there’s a giant conductor on top of the visitor centre, and I’m surrounded by trees, although as I return I realise I’m carrying metal, unlike the trees, and I’m unsure how far the conducting rod will draw lightning away from, so I quicken my step.

We continue onwards excited to see the picturesque Monument Valley skyline. As we approach the point where usually there would be a stunning vista of enormous rocks, James comes to a crawling speed. Not to take in the views but because the windscreen wipers can’t move fast enough to wipe away the deluge of water pouring down upon us. Dark grey coulds encircle us, the two-lane road can barely be seen, cars crawl forwards with hazards flashing and wipers also thrashing in desperation. Thunder cracks violently above. Lightning punches the ground every few seconds. We would have pulled in and waited for it to pass, except we can’t see the road to know where a safe place to pull over is, and we’re also on a deadline as we have another tour booked this afternoon. There is no signal on the phone to check with the company to know if it is going ahead. James is convinced it can’t possibly go ahead in these conditions. I have been burnt in the past and refuse to accept the word of anyone other than the tour company. We creep on.

The rain finally abates slightly, but now we’re driving towards lighting that crashes down in front of us. There is nowhere else to go, the road just goes straight into it. We soldier on.

We finally make it to the turn before our accommodation for the night when a thunder bolt crashes down maybe 20 metres from us. The car electrics flicker as a resonating boom of thunder echoes around. There’s nowhere else to go, and lighting rarely strikes the same place twice, right? We speed on.

At our accommodation, they tell us that the telephone lines are down, there’s no wi-fi, and no way to contact our tour company. They’re pretty sure the park is shut, and therefore our tour won’t go ahead, but I’m stubborn and need the tour company to confirm before I accept it. We rush on.

Our tour is meant to pick us up from in front of an expensive hotel. Also without power or phones, they are helping their own guests with their tour woes. They confirm the pick-up would be out front… back into the deluge, wind, thunder and lightning. I can see the tour jeeps. Why would they be there if the tours weren’t running, I think. Still convinced the tour might happen (it’s at this point I realise how much Latin America may have scarred my trust in tour operators!) I attempt to rush out, but the wind and rain pushes me back. James compromises to drive us round to the jeep in its relative safety. By now the weather has mostly passed over, although another storm looms close ready to hit once more, and we find a guy sitting with the jeeps. He was waiting for us. He confirms the tour is off, and we can go the next day. We decide to go for the morning tour and delay our drive to the Grand Canyon. We take a photo of the now visible monuments, and decide to head over to Forrest Gump Point.

The rush, panic, and storms largely over, we settle into our room that looks out onto Monument Valley. The restaurant serves only over-priced salads or sandwiches as there’s still no electricity to make anything else, so we decide on another home-made hotel-room special. With no power or signal to do any research, we sit on the balcony and drink, watching the scenery before us put on a show.

Being in the middle of the desert, this is an opportune place to take in the stars. The storm has cleared, and the power still out, meaning the only lights are the headlights of some sparse cars, and the expansive sky of stars above us.

A Monumental Conspiracy Theory

The power turns back on in the middle of the night, and so breakfasts are back on the menu. But first we’re up to watch the sunrise up over the monuments.

For breakfast we share an immense omelette, check-out, and head over to the tour. As we pass through the entry gate, the sign informs us the park is still closed. As we find our man, he tells us the roads have washed away but they should be re-opening the park soon, we can give it an hour. We wait.

We find a place to sit out looking over the valley with access to the luxury hotel wifi and so we catch up on the latest research as we wait. An hour later, we go back and see a crowd gathering. We all wait.

We continue to wait.

We get herded into the jeeps, despite being told the park is still shut.

We wait in the jeep.

We get the go-ahead! Our guide Duffy, a large navajo guy with the voice of droopy the dog, welcomes us and drives us on. At last.

Welcome to Monument Valley, the land of many films and media, apparently. Duffy tells us a bit about the area, and says that most people don’t want to hear about the Navajo or the region or what he has to think. Our jeep seems to be full of Europeans, so we think we’re safe in saying we know nothing about Ford or John Wayne and so we’re actually more interested in what he has to say. Which, it turns out, is a lot, and gets more suspect as the tour continues on. I’ll let you decide what you believe or not from his commentary…

• Monument Valley is 192,000 acres
• There are no cuss words in the Navajo language, because you’re representing your ancestors
• The Spanish did an expo in the 1600s and that’s why we have spanish names here
• The monuments are sacred. Other religions have temples and churches, native americans have nature as their church, it is sacred to them.
• Merik and Mitchel were prospectors.
• The name Navajo comes from the spanish. They are called “the people” de-neh.
• The de-neh pray, the swirls on their fingertips connect them to the heavens, the swirls on their toes connect them to earth.
• The navajo have their own health care system, they don’t need insurance from employers.
• They’re the biggest native american nation, the only tribe that got to keep their land.
• The governnment makes money from the navajo parks more than they get money from them. They have power and solar plants here, they also make money from agricultrue.
• 75% of navajo people go into tbe military, they have taught them many things for how to interact with different cultures, by showing respect to one another, rather than aggression.The navajo hunt in small groups, and the spanish couldn’t conquer them because of their skills in the area and in fighting.
• You don’t hit your kids in the navajo culture, you tap them on the shoulder and tell them to stop, hush, listen, look around. Language is carefully used and spoken with intention.
• 570 different native tribes.
• The chaco canyon is where it all began, people were given a language and some water and dispersed across the country.
• Casinos are an extension from the games they used to play.
• James gets put in a headlock to display the martial arts of the people (?).
• The older generations pass down the knowledge of how to live off the land.
• If all the satellites stopped working, they would still know how to communicate.
• The size of a smoke fire would indicate the size of the incoming party.
• Four elements, earth, wind, air, water.
• An asteroid (or missile!) has recently hit the moon, the moon controls the tides, maybe thats why we got such a big rainstorm.
• Silica in the sand makes it sparkle.
• No water, means no insects, but also no birds, except ‘trash birds‘.
• The next development is lasers, the tech giants are putting a laser on the moon, and will destroy us all. I think I’ve seen this movie!

After Duffy’s dip into the conspiratorial, he takes us back down to earth with teaching us how this area was formed. “This would take you months to learn in your universities, I can show you in five minutes“. Indeed, he shows us a clever demonstration of how sand turns to monuments and canyons.

And that’s our lot. Duffy is a kind-hearted guy who seems surprised and happy to have some people eager to listen to his tales. We learn as much about him as we do about the Navajo culture and Monument valley. It’s been an interesting tour, and it’s definitely an impressive space, full of majesty and wonder.

We quickly head off to the Grand Canyon, and are shocked by how green it is around the incredibly dry canyon!

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Adventure – Exploring our first slot canyon. Getting shown around Monument Valley whilst the area was shut to everyone but the tours.

Excitement – Being in the eye of an incredible storm. American sized portions. Tumbleweed families! Getting to Forrest Gump point and it being as brilliant in real life. The majesty of Antelope Canyon. Learning about engineering and native cultures. The stars.

Trauma – A lightning bolt a bit too close for comfort. Driving rain. Vomitting tour guide.

After the debacle of public transport and half a day spent trying to hire a car… it feels good to be back in control, destiny is in our hands once again. Alex is doing an excellent job of driving the lovely BMW we’ve hired out of Las Vegas. We’re on the highway, cruising through canyons and desert landscapes on the way to Cedar City (as recommended by Alex’s friend Nell, thank you Nell!). We briefly cross into Arizona and then up into Utah where we’re surprised to see the time jump one hour closer to the UK. It seems that some states like Utah use Daylight Saving Time while others, such as Arizona do not, even though they are directly above and below one another, slightly confusing.

Our first stop in Cedar City is of course Walmart, time to stock up for the days ahead in the aircraft hangar sized supermarket. We’re greeted by a humongous red white and blue American eagle, inflated and dangling above our heads. Fourth of July is comin’ y’all, time to celebrate some freedom!

Stocked up, we check into the hotel and pinch ourselves that we’ve actually made it. Today has been a rollercoaster of emotions and I genuinely doubted we’d ever make it here, but here we are! We dump our bags in the room and head straight to the Mexican restaurant adjacent to the hotel. After some pretty rubbish food in Vegas we enjoy bottomless amounts of chips and dip, jalapeno margaritas and even though we share a “fajita for two” there is easily enough food for four people. Thankfully doggy bags exist here. They’re even showing the Tomb Raider movie and it’s a nice reminder of home for me.

Have a Bryce Day

Alrighty, we’re back on track. Time to head to Bryce Canyon, one of the main reasons we’ve driven all the way out here. It’s an almost two hour drive from Cedar up into the mountains and what a beautiful drive it is. We’ve set off early to beat the rush and the heat, as we drive up the winding roads several deer come out to see what’s happening. Luckily there are no near misses and we can admire the graceful creatures without slamming on the brakes. Approaching the National Park we pass through natural tunnels made of beautiful red sandstone. We then park up at the start of Fairyland loop, from here on out I’ll let the pictures do the talking…

On our first day we trek the Fairyland Loop and hike up to Sunrise Point, afterwards we drop down onto the Queens Loop. Hopefully from the pictures you can see the where the name inspiration comes from. I really hope the pictures do it some justice as this place was off the charts in terms of scale and mind blowing views everywhere we looked.

Thor’s Day

Today we return to Bryce to see the Southern section of the park, walking the routes and seeing the sights we didn’t have the time (or energy) to see yesterday. We also learn the area is named after a shipwright from Scotland who came and settled here in the late 19th century. We do the Queen’s Garden Trail, continuing along the Peakaboo Trail, up to Bryce Point, then back passed the Cathedral, and up the Navajo Loop. Over to the pictures again…

After an adventurous morning we’ve just about got enough energy left to explore the short “Mossy Cave” trail. As the name suggests it’s a pathway to a natural cavern formed by rainwater seeping through the gaps in the rock and over time expanding into a vast open cavern. In the moist atmosphere moss thrives giving the cave it’s literal name. On the way back we stop for some pictures next to a waterfall, the source of the fall comes from a man-made river dug by pioneers of years gone by.

As we’ve been hiking around today, some pretty monstrous clouds have passed over our heads. Appropriately in proximity to Thor’s Hammer, sporadic cracks of thunder rumble around us. Heading back to the car from Mossy Cave the heavens open and we’re given the first (tame) taste of a thunderstorm.

Swimming Upstream

Feeling like we’ve done Bryce justice it’s time to move on to the next National Park in the area, Zion. We’ve been excited about coming here since Sidney recommended it to us way way back on the Inca trail in Sept 2023! After leaving before 7am the last two mornings, and finding out the Yosemite campsites go on sale at 8am this morning, we decide to treat ourselves to a small lie-in (and major booking binge). Big mistake. The free car park at the visitor’s center is beyond full by the time we get there and parking bays outside the park entrance are quoting $40 for one day of parking! We retreat further away to the last stop where the connecting shuttle bus will reach. A meager $15 for a day of parking here. Result (?). Eventually, after the ticket machine refuses our card and we have to install an app, we pay for parking and hop on the shuttle bus to the park entrance. It’s quiet, air-conditioned and the nice driver advises us to just cross a bridge to pick up the next shuttle bus within the park. What he doesn’t tell us is that there is a 45 minute queue to get on said bus. Doh.

By the time we reach the trailhead to start our first hike it’s almost 11am, that’ll teach us for thinking we deserved a lie-in. The hike we’ve chosen, “The Narrows” was recommended by Ben and we enjoy the bimble along the riverside in the humongous valley we find ourselves in. We start to question the suggestion when we see the trail submerge into the river and see dozens of hikers wading chest-deep upstream. It’s a popular place, with most people prepared for a jaunt in water dressed in swimming gear, as we continue on in our hiking gear. The cold river water made up of melted snow, and shade from the canyon walls at least makes for some relief from the dry heat. 

We hike for a couple of hours wading against the current and trying to keep our belongings dry. After lunch on a rocky beach surrounded by giant granite cliffs, we head back and join yet another long queue for a shuttle bus. As much as we’ve enjoyed today we feel there is still much more of Zion to see, so we alter our plans to ensure we can return tomorrow to see more of the stunning vistas.

On our way home I inform Alex there is a Chili’s restaurant in town. A place I’ve been curious to visit since Alex has told me tales of spending many a lunch-break in Lima there, and we saw her usual haunt in Lima right at the start of our trip. Put on my radar from The Office TV show, I’ve always wanted to see what it was like. It is similar to a TGI Fridays in the UK and while the menu is fairly standard American grub it’s a nice atmosphere and a pretty decent price too. 

Walter’s Wiggly Bits

Picking back up our return to Zion, we are determined to set off earlier today and make sure we park for free and get on the shuttle bus early before the queue forms. We leave our hotel at 6.45am, arriving at the car park for just before 8, the time it “starts to fill up”. Frustratingly we are a couple of minutes too late as the last spaces are snapped up before our eyes. After a few desperate loops of the car park we’re back to where we parked yesterday 😢 and there is an even longer queue for the shuttle bus by the time we get to it today 😭 

Still, despite all of that, we start the hike up to Scout Overlook and luckily the steep ascent ahead of us is still in the shade. We climb from the valley floor all the way up to the entrance to Angel’s Landing, which requires a permit. It wasn’t always possible to hike up here, but one day a man named Walter took his pickaxe and dug out 23 switchbacks so that hikers could reach incredible heights. The area of switchbacks is known as Walters Wiggles! Although we tried to get a permit for Angel’s Landing we’re somewhat relived we were not successful. The hike is on a knife’s edge ridge that requires climbing up by holding on to chains while navigating the hikers coming down the return leg. It does not look very enjoyable or safe, indeed several hikers have fallen to their deaths over the years here. We’re both amazed it was ever allowed to be climbed by the general public and still is to this day. Freedom I guess?

We pivot away from Angel’s Landing towards the Western Rim. The number of hikers drops off dramatically as we scale the exposed cliff tops high above the canyon. We continue as far as we dare before taking a few photos and returning all the way back down. By this point it’s the middle of the day and it is BAKING. We feel sympathy for those just starting the hike as the steep ascent is now getting the full force of the midday sun.

We head back down and take some rest in the shade to enjoy a hiker’s lunch (wraps, Pringles, trail mix, fruit and water) before setting out on one last hike, Emerald Falls. As we overheard on the shuttle bus this morning that the upper falls are completely dry, we opt to loop around the middle falls and then see the lower falls last. The middle falls are pretty damn dry too but we do find the lower falls fascinating and ponder what it must look like here during the vast snowmelt of the Spring months.

Escape from Zion

Returning to our favourite car park we head out of Zion through the curving bends and tunnels carved through the mountainside. Once we’re out of the stunning park it’s a whole lotta nothin’ to look at as we continue 100 miles onwards towards Page…

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Adventure – hiking around the hoodoos, finding scenery that can still take our breath away even after all we’ve seen these last 11 months, clambering through a river in entirely inappropriate gear

Excitement – waffles for breakfast! Trying ‘biscuits and gravy’ for the first time, epic driving of endless views

Trauma – missing out on parking spaces, queueing for the shuttle bus, me tripping and taking a tumble saved by a large American hero (standing still, doing nothing), being higher than Angel’s Landing with nothing but sheer cliffs either side and fearing for James’s life (Alex) ((even though he was completely fine))

Our 9 hour flight from Tokyo to LA is pretty smooth. It’s on the no-frills airline ZipAir, which I don’t think would be allowed to run in Europe as even water isn’t provided free on this long haul flight. Thankfully, we’re prepared and have ample food, drink and entertainment to get us through. We cross the date line and arrive in LA before we left Tokyo. Weird. We somehow speed through immigration and customs in the USA for the first time ever, they don’t even ask to see the panicked refundable exit train ticket I’ve booked in line as our pretend proof of exit. No declaration forms to confess to the food we’re bringing in once more. And so we’re in. They clearly haven’t been reading the blog!

A quick bus ride later, and we’re down in Redondo Beach where my old school-friend, her husband, parents, and two dogs welcome us to stay for a couple of nights.

They have a gorgeous, huge, house, and we’re so grateful to be able to stay and be able to catch up after a good many years. They also get to meet James and we can celebrate our engagement together. Despite our best intentions to explore the area on arrival, we crash out for a four hour sleep, we’ve been awake 36 hours by this point. Thankfully, this co-incides with Katie and her husband (Pete) finishing work, so somewhat more refreshed, we go out for a tour of the area, with the expansive beach and rolling sea just a few minutes walk away. Gorgeous. We catch up over dinner and a drink. It’s really lovely to be able to live a bit of a normal life, after not just back-packing for so long, but the chaos of WWOOFing. Just having a beer with friends really makes it feel like home.

Our next day, Katie and Pete generously spend their national holiday ferrying us around the tourist spots. You really can’t get anywhere in LA without a car, certainly not anywhere fast, and so it’s thanks to them we’re able to see as much as we did in the one day we have in LA. We stop off at the Chinese Theatre, checking out the hand and feet prints, that have somehow lasted since the 1920s.

The walk of fame with various stars to spot. Katie explains that it’s actually the celebrities that pay to have a star. You have to be accepted of course, you can’t just be anyone, but still, you’ve got to look at those stars with some irony that they’re the ones that paid to honour themselves on the street.

Next up is the Hollywood sign. Here’s Katie and I in the same spot in 2017…

And now!

Then back to their old stomping ground of Santa Monica pier. It’s still as bustling as ever (and full of certain ‘characters’ too). It really is lovely to be by the sea again, looking out towards the islands where we’ve just spent the last few months. The beaches here are so wide and vast, with kids splashing and playing in the cold waters, the lifeguard towers dotted through just like in the TV shows.

We explore a British store and laugh at all the things we don’t think we’ve ever seen in Britain, and all the things we forgot we missed. We grab another drink at the British themed pub next door, before heading back to theirs via the tiny, rollercoaster roads of Little Venice.

And that’s our lot in LA! A whirlwind tour and catch-up, which we couldn’t have done or enjoyed as we did without the generosity of Katie and Pete. It really was hard to load up the backpack, say goodbye, and get back on the road. But our grand tour is coming to an end, and there’s not much time to waste!

Escape from LA

Leaving the blissful suburbs of Redondo Beach, we need to head to the University near downtown to get out bus to Las Vegas. This means getting on the wonders of the LA public transit system. A journey that might take half an hour in the car, will take us over an hour on buses. Now, we’ve spent a good amount of time figuring out which bus to get, and reading up about why we shouldn’t take the Greyhound. So you can imagine our glee when I get a message that our bus has been cancelled. I then get another message (whilst we’re trying to figure out what we do instead) to say we’ve been rescheduled onto another bus, a Greyhound bus, from Downtown LA no less. We’d been reassured by Pete that the Greyhound isn’t so bad, as long as you can sit together, and near the front of the bus so you can be first to grab your bags. Of course now the money we paid to reserve our seats on our original bus belongs to Flixbus forever. The inevitable anxiety is only heightened by our arrival to the the dead quiet of downtown LA, except for the ramblings and yellings of the troubled and unwell homeless who are the only other people out on the streets. Compared to Japan, the homelessness, mental illness, drug use, poverty, and perceived lack of safety here is serious culture shock, and we both briefly consider just scrapping the USA plan entirely. Thankfully, we can pay to reserve two seats together again (effectively spending twice as much to do so), and I’m grateful we have the money to make these choices. This turns out to be a serious right call as all chaos ensues when those without reserved seats and multiple children try to sit together. Our driver takes it all on the chin and jokes with us and keeps spirits up, “y’all gonna be cousins afta this trip, doncha worry, I told y’all, y’all gonna be familee, now I neva much liked musical chairs when I was a keed, so I done wanna be playin it naw“. He makes the journey smooth and is a real example of how to take bad situations with comedy, instead of what could have very easily turned into a brawl.

Eventually, we do make it to Vegas, sitting next to each other, we even manage to get our bags without issue. Now it’s time to get more public transport because the Greyhound has dropped us an hour away, when our original destination was just to walk it. Insert more characters on the next bus, and we finally make it to our original destination of the Plaza Hotel, up on Fremont Street, the older part of town.

Our room, is HUGE. I mean, four times a Japanese apartment. The bathroom alone is probably the size of one! We dump our bags and head out to experience the bright lights of Vegas for the first time.

Everything is over-the-top. The lights. The colours. The noise. The entertainers. The drinks. The people, oh the people. I always thought that the characters in USA shows were just caricatures, but they’re not. They’re actually like that, a full melting pot of all your typical US of A characters, swigging giant slushy drinks, singing and dancing along to one of the many stage acts, laughing, chatting, having the times of their lives in Viva Las Vegas. Us, like squirrel monkeys, watch with wide-eyes trying to take it all in. Japan afterall is also completely bonkers. But then the people are all reserved and quiet and subdued. Whereas here, the people match the situation. And as a quiet introvert, I very much enjoy our spot overlooking one of the stages, watching the melting pot yell along to the tribute act below us.

Enterprising Situations

The next day is Friday, which means that all the hotels triple in price, and it’s time for us to move out quickly. We’ll come back when it’s back to cheap rates. Little do we know that the next six hours will cause us to wonder once more if we shouldn’t just fly home or somewhere else. It goes like this…

• Show up to Enterprise 1, bags packed, and ready to start our road trip
• Get told the car isn’t ready and come back in half an hour.
• Walk back along to where we started, laden with bags, in 40° heat, to get an over-priced ABC wrap for breakfast.
• Time to start over.
• Present documents.
• Get told that because we don’t have a credit card, we need to provide a plane ticket out of the USA.
• We have a train ticket AND a cruise ticket leaving the USA, and a plane leaving Canada, but no plane leaving the USA.
• Get told it doesn’t matter, it has to be a plane ticket. Policy.
• Decide to take the hit of putting the charge on my overly expensive for foreign transactions credit card (our back-up plan).
• Realise I didn’t actually bring it.
• Discuss between us infront of the staff member buying a refundable flight.
• Get told the flight has to have been booked 24 hours in advance.
• Contemplate finding somewhere cheap to stay in Vegas and do this all again tomorrow morning after the 24 hours.
• Look into other rentals and try and figure out their policies and if they’re as stupid.
• Send James off to sneakily find out from Budget whilst I hang back to book a flight in secret if so.
• Same same.
• Book two refundable flights out of Seattle.
• Doctor the booking so you can’t see when I booked it. Head to Budget.
• Lady there says they don’t take debit card payments, but she can try.
• She tries three times, but it’s declined. Whether it’s because it’s a debit card, or because they don’t have chip and pin in this backwards country, we’ll never know.
• James has the sneaky idea to try a different Enterprise, where they haven’t heard our conversation about booking a refundable flight.
• Walk and wait for 30 minutes in the now >40° heat for a bus.
• Get told off for trying to enter the bus as the door opened, rather than wait to be invited in.
• Get back on the bus 1 second later after the invite (eyeroll).
• Run across a six-lane highway because there’s literally no other way to cross.
• Arrive to Enterprise near the airport. Wait.
• Get attended to and told we’re at the wrong Enterprise. This one is geographically nearer the airport, but is actually not the airport one. She can’t match the price.
• Look into getting another bus, and give in and order an Uber.
• Get into a white Tesla with white leather seats. Bold choice!
• Make it to Enterprise airport, big edition.
• Somehow get into the Premium queue.
• Get seen straight away, with all our fake documents ready to present and our bank card back-up ideas ready… “All good guys, just head out back and get your car”
• No questions. No debates. No pleading. No begging. No fake documents needed. Chip and pin machine instead of just the magnetic swipe. Our man is a cheery dude who has no idea how happy he has made us. We try to contain our excitement so he doesn’t realise we’re technically not meant to be renting a car.
• Head round the back where another cheery lady greets us and isn’t sure she has a car of the lower calibre we reserved… “how about that one? Free upgrade“. As she points to a BMW.
• It’s an absolute beauty, but bigger than anything I’ve ever driven. Although all of the options here are big or bigger. We jump in, and get comfortable. Have we done it? Have we made it out of Vegas???? One more check-point.
• Drive to the barrier attendant, hand over the licence, “have a great trip y’all“.
• We’re off!!!!!

Satnav immediately sends us into a tour of a carpark, but we’re free. We’re actually off. From complete desperation, to being in a fancy car on our way to the canyons. Our nerves shot, we can finally breathe. I guess it’s time for the road trip!

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Adventure – getting driven around LA by Katie and Pete, wandering Fremont Street in Las Vegas after an incredibly long and stressful day

Excitement – spending time with Katie and Pete, catching up, and feeling like normal people again! Meeting Murphy and Jack (Katie, Pete and her parents’ doggos), being able to communicate in English again, making it through immigration and customs without any issues

Trauma – the unhoused situation, trying to leave LA, trying to leave Vegas, Chuckie street ‘performer’